Make friends easily but just can’t keep them? Adult friendships can be as slippery as a wet bar of soap. Everyone has a job, possibly a family and kids, it can be downright stressful and can feel hopeless. Keeping friendships can be easy, though, if you take into account these useful strategies.
Here are some tips and tricks, taken from Psychology Today about how to make (and keep) friends as adults. As you branch out and attempt to start a new friendship, give this one a try.
Having a solid friendship isn’t just good for your mental health, it’s also good for your physical health. Genuine friendships boost your immune system and lower your blood pressure. Emotionally, they help you lower your risk of depression, anxiety, and substance abuse.
While friendship can be very important for your health, make sure that you are also taking the time to be by yourself and reflect. Friendships can be exhausting at times, especially in the digital age where you can contact someone with a voice command from Siri. If you find that you are overwhelmed or that you need to take a break, not from the friendship, but just from excessive communication, let your friend know. They will understand and want what is best for you.
Friendship isn’t necessarily just a one-on-one relationship. Try expanding your friendships into your neighbourhood, your workplace, places of worship or anywhere that you frequent or take interest in.
Having trouble finding a sense of community during the current pandemic? Try finding an online community that meets to discuss something you have in common! This could be an interest, a religion, or a career. Depending on what you are looking for, there are lots of websites with group chats or profiles where you can talk about the things you have in common. This may fulfill that sense of community you are looking for.
Meeting people isn’t the hardest part about making friends, it’s continuing to grow a relationship. By continuing to speak to your friend, you are showing them that you care about them and that you want to develop your friendship. A good icebreaker that has been around for decades is the 21 questions game. You each go back and forth, asking a question, and you can either both answer the question or just the person you are asking. This leads to a mutual understanding that you want to learn about the other person, and it helps them to feel like you care and that they matter to you.
Try starting conversations that may be more personal or continuous.
This may be the most important thing to do during this current pandemic. Many friends lose touch due to the fact that there may be little to no face-to-face interaction. Make sure to check in on friends you haven’t spoken to in a while to let them know you are there for them and that you would love to have a phone call or a zoom call. It can really brighten someone’s day.
It’s easy to sabotage a friendship before it even really begins. Wanting everything to be perfect maybe what is holding you back from something great. Instead of some impressive gesture, try something simple. This could be a joke of the day or sending a cute picture of your pet or something you found funny that day. These little things make people feel noticed and let them know you listen.
Check out this link for another great article with more information on this topic: